What Cynthia Erivo Says About Your Voice

A line you need to hear, and a wish for the new year

Watch starting at 22:43 —

“How a person perceives their voice is often very linked to the things they’ve been through, and what other people have said about them, to them, about their voices.

And the work of undoing that is really brave.”

And then Cynthia adds:

“If you can unlock some of the things that have been put in the way, it really allows sunlight in. So you can actually discover the real sound you can make.”

Of course, she’s describing a singing voice — but more, too, I believe.

Honestly, I’ve never heard anyone else articulate the heart of my book and my work before so well. (But I got people sending me the clip of this moment over and over since it dropped last week, so I know y’all hear the resonance!)

And damn am I here for this sunlight metaphor. My wish for you and me and us in the new year, the moments we’re bound to feel our voice caught in our throat — speaking at work, to a friend who’s hurt us, speaking up for ourselves at home, standing on our own conviction online or in person — my wish is that you take a deep breath and invite the sunlight in.

What you’ve been through

What others have said about you

To you

About your voice

Is the past.

It’s real, its pain is real.

Heavy.

And

There’s a you that’s emerging, becoming, coming

Lighter in spirit and in sunshine.

Changing the story for you and me and us.

If you warm up before any of those heart pumping chances to speak

Let it include an invitation

Mischievously

Bravely

To bring the heat

And power

Of the sun

And the simple pleasure of its beams.

Over the last month I got to speak at a big conference for real estate agents, and then one for tech folks, and then one for educators and philanthropists funding a better world — and have been in talks with companies I may support in the new year in the beauty industry, supply chain, high school, hospitality, and healthcare. The 10-year-old in me is like WHAT?! (Do you have one of those too? The kiddo on the inside who still sees adulting as this ridiculous thing?) But the communication coach and consultant I’ve become, who collects everyone’s tender questions and crappy stories and calloused habits, knows:

Turns out, yup yup: we all talk, and we all have opinions about how we talk.

Opinions forged by what we’ve been through, and what other people have said about us, to us, about our voices.

And I’ve come to know, too, that the way we talk to ourselves about the way we talk to others determines our destiny. We cannot fully show up — in our power, in our weird, undeniable — until we talk more kindly to ourselves about our voice itself, about who this us is that’s showing up and how this us sounds.

But then — then! — when we DO, and our spirit shifts and our permission grows, damn do we show up. And damn do we end up doing destiny work, purpose-forward, heart in. Saying the thing, pitching our big ask, speaking in integrity, caring out loud, lacing our words with mischief and centering our joy like it’s our job.

I speak about it more here.

And here.

So… let’s do that.

This is my incantation for you and me and us. And now I’m gonna stop before making cheesy jokes about lightness and defying gravity. PS. I’ve got some cool announcements in the new year, only one of which I can talk about yet, but I CAN say our next group gathering over Zoom is January 3rd, 10am PT, and I’ll be able to share more then…

AND we can do some of the undoing Cynthia Erivo speaks of, together.

Which is the best way to do it.

Please mark your calendar and upgrade if you need this.

New year cheer and sunkissed love,

Samara

🎁 Oh, and if you’d like to purchase PERMISSION TO SPEAK for anyone on your list, the best link is getting it directly from Penguin Random House (Amazon is doing some algo villainy and making it look like there are no copies left, but you can try there instead if prime’s your thing).

Who are you getting it for?